Today.
I thought I might crumble.
Met with uncertainty.
But lifted up by His hand.
Learning to listen and pray,
Being surrounded by His love,
Learning more about His character,
He is real and the Holy Spirit is there too,
Growing spiritually in His word,
Being real and honest,
Learning to learn can be tough,
But not impossible with Him,
I love Him,
He loves me,
I’m learning to trust,
He is ever so kind and patient,
Always learning,
Always Running to Him.
-KI
A new day.
A new chance.
The journey of the twisted river.
The streams churning, the drops that splash off of the jagged rocks and cover my legs.
Bare feet sinking in the murky sand.
Do I dare to continue the journey?
When there is so much fury?
The hope beyond the horizon,
The Son is beckoning,
Hand outstretched and shielding the light,
This is going to be a fight!
The Warrior spirit stirs within,
Stand firm, eyes focused, clenched fists,
Stretch, Pull, Bend, Extend,
Release the taut posture,
Open…Close; Inhale…Exhale,
Just a little bit more,
Release the barbaric yarp,
The deep, sharp, gentle and soft guttural sounds,
Let it flow, Let it go!
I might break!
The river is flowing,
What do you choose?
To fight for eternal love,
River, Break.
We all are told that the Lord is our Father, our Prince of Peace, the Almighty Counselor
But
Do you let Him do what He needs to do in your life?
I know I struggle with complete surrender of those deep places of pain and hurt. But as my friend reminded me…He can fix it, if we let Him.
He is a gentleman and will not cross your boundaries unless you want Him to come in, He waits for you to…trust.
Trust, Trust, Trust.
When you feel like you can no longer keep fighting… keep going. He is with you, He is ready to help… let Him love you.
Let Him work in you. To fix the brokenness and to help protect your heart. To help you fight those deep hard battles, to fight those hard life decisions and to embrace and cover you in His arms.
He dearly loves you!
Trust Him.
As I learn to Listen to God, I am reminded that He ultimately desires that I simply obey.
Obedience always seems like a place where I just want to run away or rebel against it. To just have what I want without working through the hard, damnable, life-draining muck. Who really wants to work through the stuff that hurts so much that no one knows the pain, but Him?
He knows.
He cares.
He loves unconditionally.
Jesus…
Do you see me? Can I trust you?
There is this abysmal place inside that I protect…the last pieces of my heart…what is left of it anyway. I don’t even think it is a heart most days. A vast place where pieces drift here and there.
Deep Breath
Years ago… it was shattered into a million pieces. Those pieces of pieces of pieces are missing to me. Lost, stolen, taken, hijacked without consent.
Dare I say that I believe that Jesus can rebuild my heart and make it new…
He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.
Psalms 147:3 CSB
To Obey… Dear Jesus… I’m trying to trust and let go!
I must not just hear, but obey. He fights for me!
To surrender everything and lay all of it at your feet!
For me, the hardest pieces are accepting everything that has happened, acknowledging that I cannot fix all of it on my own, trusting that you are big enough and strong enough to hold onto me as the serious heart surgery must be done.
Stop Running Away!
He extends His arms…
He is patiently waiting for me to run to Him and obey.
Peace can only come after obedience.
Our Lord is great, vast in power; His understanding is infinite.
Psalms 147:5 CSB
Praying…
I seek you. I want you.
Please help me to feel safe.
Krysten.Ivey 