There’s a Girl I know…

She is witty

A bright soul

Someone who loves no matter what

Who drops everything to pray for anyone on their behalf or in person

Loves Jesus

More than you know

She is so hard on herself

Seeks to make a difference and share her testimony

Big eyes, Big heart, Big Hopes…

A fighter

A warrior

A princess

She strives to be made whole in God.

She doubts who she truly is in the eyes of her Father.

She screams instead of surrendering to love.

She fears being hurt…

Because that is what she is used to.

But she does love the good shepherd.

Hugs can be warm and comforting.

She desires to be seen, known, heard and loved.

The journey continues on…

New beginnings, New changes…

To be aware of His Presence.

He knows her, He sees her, He loves her.

Sometimes

The chiming of the bell,

The alarm that wakes you to the core,

Tick, Tock goes the clock,

Am I too late?

To snip and suture the wound?

I need the Almighty Surgeon and Healer.

To put the pieces back together…..

To help me to be whole.

Sometimes I cry,

Sometimes I pray,

Sometimes I reach my hands to the sky,

And sometimes I feel afraid.

To feel, is okay.

But to remain in the depths of despair,

That mindset needs a reset,

Hold on tight, deep breath, bosom to the floor with hands clasped gently together.

He will meet you there.

He is always with you, always.

That hope that resonates to the core,

I keep repeating… He is Here…

He knows that I’m drowning…

He holds the vine…

Reach out, it is within sight,

Jump and take flight.

He’s got you,

He knows your brokenness,

He knows your desires to be made whole.

Numb

He is there.

Maybe that is where I’m supposed to be?

I need to be held,

Because I’m falling apart.

Deep breath.

Listen.

He loves you and I.

To be whole.

Desolation

What is love?

Unconditional love?

Jesus, I reach to you

I feel alone,

I feel angry,

I feel deeply hurt.

Those places where the crows fly,

The dust swirls,

The sun blocked by the polluted atmosphere,

I am thirsty, I am hungry, I struggle to breathe,

My hope is in you,

Please help me to get this pain out,

To release it all to you,

To trust you.

Dear Poppa, I need you close.

The beckoning

Even in the turmoil,

Of the dark desolate place,

There is hope,

A light so bright,

That it beckons,

As if to extend warmth,

A hand,

A smile,

Silly me I must have forgotten my manners,

My furrowed brow says No,

My soul says yes,

My heart is healing slowly.

The truth,

Hope is rising,

More everyday,

To come alongside, Thank you,

My feet are worn and bloody,

My eyes are aching,

But there is hope,

He died for me,

He chose me,

He adopted me,

He is lifting my heart and my head.

He brings restoration,

He brings redemption,

But I struggle,

And He knows,

I squirm and throw a fit,

Because healing hurts,

And I’d rather not feel,

But feeling can only lead to understanding,

His compassion,

His love,

His Grace.

So, I lean into Him,

A little more each day.

May the lies stop hindering my steps.

Will you comfort me as I heal?

I would like that Jesus.

Rage to Hope

The struggle,

The deep ache,

For hope,

For love,

For Him to keep you covered,

Keep focused baby girl,

Deep breath,

Jesus, help.

I need help.

I need the broken pieces to come back together,

To feel something better than the rage,

To be free and clean,

Will you sit with me?

Even in my mess?

Even with my anger?

I cannot do this alone.

Will you walk with me?

Can you hold my hand and wash my face?

Come in my secret place and love me?

Even if it’s dark,

Please help me to see more of you.

I want to know you more,

I long for that embrace of safety and trust.

I’m seeking you the best I know how to.

Please continue to teach me.

Please do not give up on me.

I see you watering the flowers,

I want to be there too.

It’s my hope and I’m learning.

Rage go away.

Peace Be Still